Betrayal

I suppose on the list of betrayals recorded in the Bible, this is near the bottom of the list.

No one ever thinks about the betrayal of David on the part of the people of Keilah, mostly because it never quite happened. It would have, however, if David had not acted.

Still, it must have been painful for David and his men.

Here they had risked their lives to save the lives of the people of Keilah from the Philistines.

But when Saul mustered his army to capture David at Keilah, David found that the people would do nothing to help him.

Instead, they would rather surrender David to Saul than risk battle against the king.

And when David found this out, he and his men swiftly left the city before Saul could get there.

What can we learn from David’s actions when faced with betrayal?

First, forgiveness and understanding. And actually, the latter makes the former possible.

David had every right to be angry with the people of Keilah. He had risked his life and the life of his men, and yet they would not lift a finger to help him.

But from what we can see, David never took out his anger on them. He never condemned them. Instead, he showed understanding and forgiveness.

He understood why they acted as they did. In this case, the people of Keilah were unable to defend themselves.

That’s why they needed David’s help against the Philistines. And that’s why when Saul came with his men, it would’ve been easy for them to give in to fear and betray David to Saul.

I heard the story of a man who was abused by his father. And it took a long time for him to forgive.

The turning point came when he found out that his father had been abused too. With that knowledge came understanding of his father, and it allowed him to forgive his dad.

If you’re struggling with forgiveness of people who betray you, one key thing to pray for is understanding. Because oftentimes, as Jesus said, the people who hurt us “know not what they do.” (Luke 23:34)

But the second thing to learn from this is that even though we need to learn to understand and forgive the other person, there’s no need to keep ourselves in a place where they can hurt us.

David understood the people’s weaknesses in Keilah. He had a forgiving heart toward them. But when he knew they would betray him, he left.

Sometimes, people feel like forgiveness means permitting the other person to continue their actions. To allow them to keep hurting us.

But that’s not true. We should forgive, but as long as there is no repentance, we would be foolish to keep ourselves in a place of vulnerability to them.

David didn’t do this with the people of Keilah. And he certainly didn’t do it with Saul.

Have you been betrayed? God calls us to understand. He calls us to forgive.

But he doesn’t call us to continue suffering under their hand.