Filtering the good from the bad

It’s pretty clear by this point that David was fed up with Joab. 

On top of having murdered Abner when David was trying to unify Israel, now he had killed David’s own son, against David’s own express wishes. 

It’s never expressly stated that David found this out, but as one of Joab’s soldiers put it, “nothing is hidden from the king”  (2 Samuel 18:13). 

Also add to the fact that he was ready to take on Absalom’s general to head his own armies and David’s words of disgust to Joab’s brother Abishai when he wanted to kill Shimei (2 Samuel 19:22).

All in all, I think there can be no doubt that David had had enough.

Joab was a blood-thirsty, self-serving man.  But in this passage he gave David some good advice. 

David was weeping so much for Absalom that he didn’t realize how it was affecting the men who had fought and given their lives for him.  Because they heard that David was weeping, they came into the city, hanging their heads.

And Joab told David,

You love those who hate you and hate those who love you.

You have made it clear today that the commanders and their men mean nothing to you. I see that you would be pleased if Absalom were alive today and all of us were dead. 

Now go out and encourage your men. I swear by the Lord that if you don’t go out, not a man will be left with you by nightfall.

This will be worse for you than all the calamities that have come upon you from your youth till now.  (2 Samuel 19:6-7)

It would’ve been so easy for David to reject Joab’s advice out of hand.  To let his anger cause him to shut out Joab’s words, painful though they were. 

Especially painful since it was by Joab’s own hand that Absalom died.

But David was able to filter out the good advice from the source it came from.  And he went out to his men to thank and encourage them.

Sometimes we have to do the same thing that David did.

There may be a person we dislike.  It may be a relative.  It may be a boss or someone at work.  It may be someone at church.  And maybe they have done things to upset us or hurt us. 

But every once in a while, they may say something that’s for our good.  And like David we need to filter out the good advice they have from the dislike that we feel for them.

That takes humility.  And it takes a heart that’s willing to listen. 

Sometimes the words of God can come from the most unexpected people.  Be sure that you don’t miss them because of your feelings for another.