Barely seeing

Yes, I know I wrote on this fairly recently. But sometimes the 3 different Bible-reading plans I’m using overlap, and today happened to bring me back here.

It struck me even more strongly today than it did the last time.

In those days the word of the Lord was rare…

One day Eli, whose eyesight was failing, was lying in his usual place. (1 Samuel 3:1-2)

Today I was thinking, “How often do I hear the Lord speaking to me? How is my spiritual eyesight? Do I see as clearly as I think I do?”

I think I can say I definitely have been hearing God better than I did a year or two ago. At least, I have been sensing his leading in my life.

I see changes in how I use my time, the things I read, and in how I’m making more of an effort to reach out and touch people that God has put in my path.

That said…

I don’t spend nearly enough time praying. That is probably the weakest area of my spiritual life right now. Taking the time to pray. And listen.

So when I’m asked my opinion on things or a crisis hits, I really wonder how much I’m a conduit for God’s Spirit, and how much I’m operating on my own wisdom.

“The word of the Lord was rare.”

I can remember two times in my life when God spoke as clear as day. Where he clearly broke into my life and intervened.

There are still times when I sense his gentle leading, or his subtle direction. That’s what I mean when I say I have been hearing from him better lately.

I’ve also been seeing new things in his Word, and learning new things, so in that sense I have been hearing his voice.

And when I sin, of course, the Holy Spirit is always right there to prick my heart.

But outright, clear as crystal speaking..life-changing stuff. Only twice in my life.

No, I didn’t hear a voice out loud from heaven. But thoughts came into my mind that clearly did not come from me. I haven’t had that in perhaps over 20 years.

That’s what I need more of. That’s what I long for.

Lord, as you did with Samuel thousands of years ago, come and stand by my side. Speak. And give me ears to hear. I long to hear your voice. I hunger for it. I thirst for it.

Increase that hunger and thirst for you in me. And then fill it. Give me full spiritual eyesight. To see what you see. To see your will. To see you. In Jesus’ name, amen.